Today is 5 Ik’ 5 Yaxk’in

1598 shopping days until 4 Ahau 3 K’ank’in. 

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Paris Hilton throws her, um, hat into the ring…

The 27-year-old appears reclining on a sun lounger beside a swimming pool, dressed only in a skimpy leopard-print bathing costume.

“Hey America, I’m Paris Hilton and I’m a celebrity too,” Hilton declares breezily. “Only I’m not from the olden days and I’m not promising change like that other guy. I’m just hot!

“But then that wrinkly white-haired guy used me in his campaign ad, which I guess means I’m running for president. So thanks for the endorsement white-haired dude, and I want America to know I’m, like, totally ready to lead.”

Hilton then offers an alternative US energy strategy, suggesting that she plans to combine elements from McCain and Democratic rival Barack Obama’s policy platforms.

“We can do limited offshore drilling with strict environmental oversight while creating tax incentives to get Detroit making hybrid and electric cars. … Energy crisis solved, I’ll see you at the debates, bitches!”

Hilton then signs off by declaring that she is now mulling her choices for vice president. “I’m thinking Rihanna,” she said, referring to the singer-songwriter.

“I’ll see you at the White House,” Hilton adds. “Oh, and I might paint it pink. Bye!”

IMHO, this video deserves to go viral. As Pontiff of the Seventh Day Atheist Aztec Baptist Synod, I grant absolution and perpetual indulgence of one (1) mortal sin of your choice to any pilgrim or seeker that spreads the disease.

ox Nihil Obstat Ego Pater Omed

We thank Brother Spike for the heads up.


5 responses to “Today is 5 Ik’ 5 Yaxk’in

  1. I posted it yesterday morning. How many of my sins may be indulgent?

  2. Bless you young Goddess, even if you are showing a few pre-wrinkleous signs yourself.

  3. One. One mortal sin of your choice.

    It that His Loveliness the Pope was behind the curve, so to speak, on the Hilton candidacy, and has needlessly issued a perpetual indulgence for mortal sin to virtually everybody in the virtual world. Alas, perpetual indulgences are inherently nonrevokable. I shall have to assign myself penance for being wasteful with my grace.

  4. Erratum: Put a “seems” between “it” and “that.”

  5. If Boosh can paper D.C. with pardons strewn from his CYA pen as he exits stage left, the Good Doctor shalt have no virtual, perpetual, nor vocable remorse, even for the issuing of plenary indulgences. Does not the Shepherd leave the flock in search of one stray lamb ? [[ Unless of course that lamb voted twice for the Bungle, in which case may the errant ungulate be perpetually indulged in all worlds upon the rough pike of Dr. Vlad the Impaler. ]]

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